Sometimes Pretty Isn’t Enough

Jamie Oliver’s Frozen Grapes


I was watching Jamie Oliver do his bish-bash to a slab of chocolate, and his yazoo-yazoo to old chunks of breads in a food processor. He has a programme on telly, Jamie’s Family Christmas, where his two girls choose their favourite foods that their dad makes.

He had one idea for pre-dinner nibbles that caught my attention. You see, we’re having a few neighbours over for Christmas dinner, and I was looking for some new ideas. Jamie suggested freezing grapes. Well I had some in the fridge. Mr Misky slices them into his oatmeal each morning. So I nicked a few of them, put them in a freezer-proof dish, and slid them into an Arctic chill for 2 hours. That’s what Jamie suggested on timing: 2 hours.

Pretty photo, don’t you think? I used Mr Misky’s  fancy camera for this shot as mine is a fool’s toy that fits in my jeans pocket….. “Hear that, Santa?”

Well, sometimes pretty just doesn’t cut it. Mr Misky agreed that they were pretty as a picture, but if the ‘eating’ isn’t right, then the idea isn’t right. Mr Misky bit into it, and his face coiled up in pain as the cold lit fire into one of his wonky root canals. When he recovered he said, “Tastes like a grape,” and then asked if it was supposed to taste that way … like a grape. I don’t know what he was expecting – frozen grapes don’t taste like Stilton or baked beans; they taste like grapes. He wasn’t impressed.

Jamie said these would taste “brilliant’, like sorbet. Jamie is wrong. These taste like little grape iced marbles. If you’re married to a Dane, I suggest that you forget about the frozen grapes. Just give him some cheese instead.

Here’s the info on Jamie’s Family Christmas, which contrary to the frozen grapes fiasco, is a wonderfully entertaining and inspiring show to watch.


17 Comments Add yours

  1. I’m with you on this….anything that makes teeth hurt comes from Torquemada’s Christmas Treats Volume 1. I think Jamie is a bit desperate these days:)

    1. Misky says:

      His style of cooking is a testament that someone else tidies and cleans his kitchen.

  2. I’m happy to watch Jamie bish bash bosh on TV, but his recipes just don’t work for me. A pretty photo though.

    1. Misky says:

      Only a few of his oodles of recipes work for me. His fish pie is heaven.

  3. Linda E.H. says:

    maybe not for Christmas but we enjoy frozen grapes in the summer. I hold them on my tongue for a while until they start to warm a bit. They’re so refreshing when it is hot and humid.

    1. Misky says:

      I’ll try them again this summer, assuming that the temperature ever rises to above freezing again, and we’ll see if they score higher yum-o-meter. 🙂

  4. barbara_y says:

    Grins. I do like your pic. Nice enough for an ad.

    Maybe frozen grapes after a spicy course? That’s the only excuse I can think of for icy-anything in winter. I like ol’ Jamie, though when he gets excited I could use subtitles.

    1. Misky says:

      Mr Misk puts on TV Closed Caption subtitles when it involves anyone with a Scottish accent. He can’t make heads nor tails of it, so I empathise completely with you. Jamie leans toward what we call Estuary English.

  5. Glenda says:

    Hi Misky, I have made many a recipe from celebrity chefs only to think ho um. They start out great but after a while I think fame goes to their head and they keep releasing more and more books just for the money

    1. Misky says:

      Jamie definitely fits that description. Glenda.


  6. narf77 says:

    Toss them into a food processor and mush them to sorbet…if Mohamad won’t come to the mountain and all! Have a great (frozen grape free) Christmas and I am with the Dane on the cheese board 😉

    1. Misky says:

      Now that’s a good idea! Maybe with some frozen bananas. Whiz it all up together.

      1. narf77 says:

        NOW your talking…add a few chocolate chips and even the Dane would give it a tango around his tastebuds…I think we might be onto something. I wouldn’t bother crediting Mr Oliver when you share the love…it is SO far removed from his “creation” I think you invented something new :)…rose essence… rum soaked raisins…chopped macadamia nuts! emmmm…. 😉

  7. Misky, that’s too funny. Of course, it tastes like a grape, but I’d have believed Jamie as well if he said it tasted like sorbet. 🙂 I’m actually a big Jamie fan, so thank you for the link to his show! Hope you’re having a great December – all the very best to you and Peder for a glorious Christmas! xx

    1. Misky says:

      A busy December, that’s for sure! Things are starting to be calmer now, which is great relief. We did the final shop today, so we’re counting down to the big meal! Happy Christmas to you and your family, too!

  8. Love it – tell it like it is !! And yes to cheese.
    I was thinking of you and “our wallflower debacle” and wondering how yours are fairing, One thing I think we may have got wrong is that we planted to early – I saw something from Great Dixter a while ago and they planted theirs in November……. that and the mild autumn we had when the slugs were still rampant did for mine. Oh well, live and learn – a bit like frozen grapes?!

    1. Misky says:

      Wow, that’s a brilliant idea. Out of the dozen or so, I have about 5 remaining that the slugs haven’t eaten. Ravenous little beasties.

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